I’m sorry it’s been so long since I posted anything significant, usually when I don’t post for a long time it means things are bad, but actually they’re not, just busy. Some updates:
1. Work continues to be stressful and overwhelming, but I am coping with that much better. I will be off for the last two weeks of summer, and I am really looking forward to that.
2. I’m better in general. The last time I talked about this I was struggling a lot with driving anxiety, and generalized anxiety. Since then I have been doing cognitive behavioural therapy and it’s been helping, a lot! I recently finished my 12 week program, through an online program called Beacon (which is covered by my insurance company however I was offered the program for free) and it has really helped me. It’s very similar to in person cognitive behavioural therapy except all the conversation happens by text message. In April, May, and June I had a permanent pit of anxiety in my stomach every moment of every day. Though do I still have anxious moments (who doesn’t? We are wired to worry about things. Worry is protective, until it goes into overdrive), I no longer feel like that, and I am able to move past them and get on with my day. Last week I drove to Milton and back without issue, I’ve also been driving to Oshawa a lot. It’s a bit hard to believe that I have now overcome driving anxiety attack twice, because when I’m in the middle of them it is impossible to think that I will ever be able to do it again (I cannot even express how terrifying it is to have a panic attack while driving on the highway, surrounded by fast moving cars. Every instinct I have is to slam on the brakes and stop, which I know will kill me and possibly those around me. It is beyond terrifying to get on the highway knowing that might happen-but forcing myself to do so is the only way to overcome it). Therapy does work though, I strongly recommend anybody that is going through anxiety or phobia that is impacting their quality of life seek a good cognitive behavioural therapy program, including thought records and exposures.
3. I’ve been exercising a lot. Not running as much as I would like, but I have been using my spin bike, going to Pilates and barre classes, walking a lot, running a bit, and weightlifting.
4. I completed my 150 km of biking in June, fundraising almost $500 for sick kids hospital. Unfortunately I did most of it on my spin bike. This is because my anxiety was impacting my biking, it was hard for me to get on my bike without worrying that I was going to fall, get an accident, get hit by a car, etc. It probably would’ve been better for me to expose myself to it, but I was working hard enough doing that with driving! Now that I’m driving better, it might be a good time for me to get back on my bike!
5. Both kids went to camp for the month of July. I missed them but it was really nice to get a break from parenting, particularly rushing to be home by 6pm every day and all of the responsibilities that come with caring for children. It enabled me to get back into classes at the gym, see some of my clients at work that I don’t get to see very often because they are busy during the day, and spend some extra time taking care of some things around the house. Of course Adam and I enjoyed the time together, alone and with friends!
6. My hair has been awesome. I’ve been working hard using different products and techniques to get the curling texture the way I like it. A product I would love to tell my curly girl reader about is Mixed Chicks morning after redefining foam! It’s a foam for refreshing second and third day curls. I never get to third day hair, but it’s great for second day hair. Basically I section my hair into four sections, run a couple pumps of the foam through each section, scrunch it up, defuse it, and then scrunch out the crunch when it is fully dry. It creates perfect almost frizz-free curls, as good as fresh!
7. The above picture was from the Taylor Swift concert, that we all went to last weekend. It was Charlotte’s first concert, it was a bit of a special treat because we actually had separate seats (Adam and Charlotte decided to go months ago, and then Zoë and I decided to join them thanks to a kind offer from beloved relatives to purchase us tickets). Adam and I sat together, and the girls sat together a couple sections over. In 18 years Adam and I have never been to a concert, so it was a bit of a special date for us as well as our whole family. We are all Taylor Swift lovers and feel no shame for that!
9. I believe I’ve talked in the past about my search for eyeliner that does not smudge, or crease. Recently I have found two that I love.
Wonder 2 super-stayliner Is available online or at the showcase stores. Comes in shimmery and matte formulas, and several colours. I had the black shimmery one (I would’ve preferred the matte but it was not in stock), and I liked it. It is a pencil so it requires sharpening and can get a bit too smudgy if not sharp enough. Once applied and let to dry, it lasts all day! ~$20.
Marcelle forever sharp waterproof is what I purchased to replace the Wonder, because I didn’t want to wait to order it online and they did not have the colour I wanted in stock at showplace. I did a search for cruelty free brands and eyeliner reviews from those brands, that led me to this one. I have to say I’m so thankful I did! I love that it’s not a pencil so I don’t have to sharpen it, and it lasts perfectly! Last weekend I lined my eyes with it before going swimming. When I got out of the pool after half an hour, my eyeliner was still perfect! Bonus, it’s only $12 and of course there are often sales at SHOPPERS DRUG MART.
I think I’ve mentioned this before but a trick I use for eyeliner to make sure that it stays on and is not close is once I have applied it, I keep my eyelids shut for a full 30 seconds (I use this time to powder my face since I can do that without looking). After that I dab them lightly with my powder puff to make sure that the eyeliner is dry. If any of it comes off on the puff I wait another 30 seconds. This, plus a great waterproof liner, perfectly ensures that my eyeliner does not crease and transfer to the rest of my eyelid (something I have been struggling with a lot).