A decision

I have maintained the same weight, or a 5lbs radius around it, since the end of summer 2010. Which is great. Really…really great. Because here I was in late 2009 just before my journey started, and September 2010 when I was “done”, and now:

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So yeah…I did good.

But, I am so over still being 15 or so pounds over my ideal, and telling myself I cannot do better. Because I can. Maybe not much…but I can. Maybe I couldn’t between late 2010 and now. Maybe I was not sufficiently motivated, and maintaining was the best I can do for those almost 3 years-after a hard year of actively dieting. But now is now…and now…if I can no longer eat bread and pasta (something I could not fathom doing in 2011, though my reason is different) then I can make the changes I need to in order to lose those last 15 or so pounds to get where I want to be, which is well into the healthy BMI range (right now, I teeter on the edge of it, toppling over every day except when I have diarrhea most days).

I eat pretty well these days, but I still have some habits I know I need to change if I want to lose more weight, or even maintain my weight as I get older. First of all, I often snack my car so I’m not too hungry at meal times…often on nuts. Nuts are good for me but too fattening to eat mindlessly, so eating an apple would be better! I also have a glass of wine a few too many nights a week, which is just empty calories. I’ve been trying to get in the habit of drinking tea instead to relax, And have been pretty successful at making that switch… But would like to be even more so. I also just need to keep an eye my portion size is a little bit more, and drink more water. I have no plans to change my exercise. I could not really exercise more, and I don’t want to exercise differently…I like what I do, which is why I have kept it up, and don’t want to mess with it. I know the exercise I do is perfectly reasonable to maintain a healthy weight, and diet is where the changes need to be.

So, since tracking always works best for me, I’ve decided to join MyFitnessPal, a free tracking program. Today was my first day, I ate exactly the way I normally do as far as meals and planned snacks go, but I did not have any extra (like in the car or while walking through the kitchen) snacks nor did I have a glass of wine. I came in at just under the suggested calories, so hopefully I will be able to do this! I have given myself three months to lose 15 pounds, so that’s only a pound a week. I know that is pretty slow… But I know for me that going slowly and making changes slowly is what works best for losing weight and keeping it off.  Hopefully, by my 40th birthday in the middle of November, I will be at my goal weight! It would be a great way to hit the big 40, the perfect present to myself! Since I am going on TROOP next week, I guess it is not the best week to start…but I’ll just have to take a few days off tracking and make the best choices I can with what I am offered those days. TROOP is super duper active and I am pretty limited in my options (since it is not my kitchen and I cannot just keep snacking, and a lot of the things there will have Gluten anyways) so it should be fine. 

By the way, I was not careful with gluten at all last weekend. I picked at the kids pizza crusts on Friday, had a S’more on Sunday and Chinese food (loads of soy sauce, which has wheat gluten in it) Monday and today…on anti-biotics. Normally I would have tried to knock out an infection this early (I was fine today, just a bit achy, sore throat and visibly swollen tonsils, and mild fever…enough to know but not feel “sick”), but I didn’t want to risk it with TROOP coming up. I’ll be done my week on clindamycin just in time to not need it on the trip. Which is good, since it gives me the runs!

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