I have to admit, the last week has been a challenge to my positivity and optimism. I am angry and scared the cancer has to be a part of my life, a part of my body, a part of my family.
They (who? they!) say a good thing to do is count one’s blessings. I don’t really believe in blessings, but I guess I do believe in luck or something, so here are some things I’m thankful for.
1. My marriage. It hasn’t always been easy, but we have always fought to fix it. It is strong now, and I’m so thankful for that, because I don’t think I could do this without my husband.
2. My kids. Two happy healthy beautiful young ladies, who inspire me to fight every day. Not just cancer, but anything that’s hard.
3. That I have breast cancer. Yes, it sucks. Yes, the treatment will suck. But there is a treatment. I will probably have an excellent prognosis. I will probably one day say “I am cancer free”. There are so many people that will never be able to say that or something like it. People with late stage or incurable cancer, people with Alzheimer’s, people with traumatic brain injuries, people with ALS…there are so many life-altering incurable chronic illnesses out there. I am thankful that my cancer is, most likely, very treatable.
4. My work. I am lucky to have a job I love. I’m lucky to have had a job I love for the last 15 years, in spite of some hard times. But particularly now, in the contract I am doing, I am thrilled with my work. I plan to work through my treatment if I can, not because of money, but because I took this contract for a reason and I want to do it! I am lucky to have a job that makes me want to work through a serious illness.
5. My supervisors, and my colleagues. Incredibly supportive people that I want to spend time with.
6. I live in Canada, I have provincial health insurance, and excellent benefits through my work. This will not bankrupt us.
7. My friends and family. I’m surrounded by love and support. Every day I get messages asking what people can do. Right now the answer is not much, but I know that if and when that changes, there are people I can call on to be there for me and my household.