Since I need six, that means I’m halfway there! So exciting to reach this milestone, also a little bit scary because my next three infusions are a different medication. I feel so lucky because I’ve been tolerating the ones I’m on now very well; the week I get my infusion is a bit rough (not awful), but then I have two really great weeks were life is almost normal. I know what to expect and when to expect it, so it’s pretty easy for me to cope with it. This new medication is an unknown to me. I’m told that I will probably tolerate it OK, but it definitely comes with some different side effects that I will need to be careful for. Bone pain, nail damage, and neuropathy being the big ones! Also the fact that chemotherapy is cumulative, so I will probably be getting more tired, and need to be even more watchful of my blood levels. This time around my white blood count was a bit low, not low enough to hold back on chemo, but slightly lower than normal. In good news, red blood cells and platelets were nice and high (higher than last time)!
Another thing that’s a bit tough about being halfway through my chemo is I’m starting to think ahead. I really should stop that!
Radiation: just the thought of have to drive to a hospital that’s not particularly convenient to me every day for 25 workdays makes me want to vomit! Also the cost of parking! Since I’m hoping to work through it I won’t really be able to take advantage of the drives that people will offer me or volunteer programs, and to be honest I wouldn’t want that anyway. I definitely to prefer to be by myself in my own car during stressful drives; listing to music, audiobooks, or podcasts. I’m also quite worried about getting burns from the radiation, I’m quite pale and sunburn easily, I wonder if that makes it worse.
Tamoxifen: The last part of my treatment will be a medication for 5 to 10 years and that will help limit the estrogen my body creates, because the kind of cancer I have reacts to estrogen. I’m quite freaked out by these medications! A lot of people complain of pretty awful side effects, hot flashes and neuropathy and…weight gain! I know my concerns about weight gain seem kind of obsessive and stupid, considering that I’m fighting cancer, but anybody that’s been reading my blog for a while knows that I have good reason to be concerned, and anybody that doesn’t agree can kiss my butt. I’m not fighting for any life, I’m fighting for my life and being a fit active woman of a healthy weight is a big part of the life I want to lead! I’ve been overweight or obese for most of my adult life, I have only had five years of enjoying being a size that I (usually) really feel good about, I’m not ready for that to end.
Oh well, I need to slow down and take it day by day. Enjoy where I am now which is halfway through chemotherapy and knowing that after about 6-8 days of feeling a bit off, I’m going to have two weeks of feeling great!